Hard for me to recap Quilt Market without touching on what it all really meant to me, spiritually. For those of you rolling your eyes and muttering, "oh, here she goes with the Jesus thing"...yes, the Jesus thing. If I'm to be honest about what matters most to me then sharing that is just as important as the glitz and photo ops. I had a pastor once say that it doesn't really matter if the whole Jesus thing is real or not - living our lives to be good to one another, to find peace and contentment in prayer - what does it hurt? If it all turns out to be a hoax then our lives still would have been better for the faith we have had. Well, at least that's how I view it.
So, for me, launching our business is much more meaningful than you can imagine. It's been in the making for about 6 years now. It's been a lot of work. A lot of planning. A lot of sacrifice.
As we were taking off from Columbus to Houston, I had this intense sense of being surrounded by angels. I also had a really strong feeling of being supported by my sister and my grandmother. Both have passed on many years ago and both were wonderful seamstresses. I never spent enough time with my sister because I was only 3 when she died but I know that my Grammy (the one whose photo is in my Patsy Ann Apron Top pattern) taught her to sew. For some reason, my mind was flooded with thoughts of them and how excited they both would be if they could see what I was about to embark on.
For all the exciting things that happened and are still evolving from my trip to Houston, I am extremely humbled and grateful. I have prayed for so long for answers, for a light to my path, to help our family find a way to get to where we needed to be.
One of those prayers has always been for my peas. Twins are high risk and my pregnancy included a 2+ week hospital stay and then more bedrest and medications to keep them until 36 weeks. I had to stay on my back 24/7. Eat laying down. Bathe lying down. And when they were born, they were perfect. They are perfect. But as time has progressed, we have discovered small things that have been stumbling blocks in their development. Multiple things. And this long complicated puzzle we have slowly watched year to year as they grow, started to come together within days after I got home from Houston.
I won't go into detail as it is quite private but it was a moment, when I was sitting watching clinicians perform assessments and I was sobbing as I watched. It's heartbreaking to see your children struggle and feel helpless.
And as the days progress, and our business grows, I see that the Lord HAS answered those prayers. For that exact moment brought new realities for us and new challenges and I could see now, that THIS was the time that HE had chosen for our family. This was, this IS the right time. For many reasons.
Sometimes, when we pray for what we want, it's hard to be patient and wait. And not know if you'll ever get what you asked for. I didn't exactly get what I asked for but I got what I needed, what our family needed. And I am humbled. And grateful. And for the 6 years we have also waited on a diagnosis for our peas, I am thankful to know what, how, and where to go. Mothers just want to do it all for our kids, make everything better but there are some things, I just can't do. Those are the things that make me cry. Then. And now as I write this. Because I just want them to not be frustrated, or struggle, or to give up.
I think that since my husband and I have made certain that this business is a full on family affair, it's given our peas a sense of pride, and ownership, and accomplishment. They are part of the success, what little ones we can claim at the moment, and we wholeheartedly celebrate everything that those beautiful girls are to us.
This post may not have made much sense to you but the spiritual side of this experience has been very heavy on my heart. I do feel God's hand in all that we do and I do feel extremely blessed, for whatever may come, I know that God always has a way to provide for us. Now more than ever, it's an answer to a prayer.